I Am a Rock

Gaining Weight - An Iterative Integration Model

2010-05-22T21:46:00.002+08:00

Hello,

好久不见，长久没来因为一直在忙于科研，最近小有所成，特此分享。

我发现变胖是一个迭代的积分过程——以腹部为例，你会发现肚子从一个平面，分裂成两个，然后三层，四层……n层的曲面的累加，amazing的是n增长到极限会让这多个曲面积分成一个大曲面，更amazing的是，这个大曲面继续分裂成一层，两层，……n层，近而变成一个弧度更大的曲面……

我在此大胆预言，最后这个迭代过程会收敛为一个——球体。

李铁为证。

The Da Vinci Eggs

2007-05-21T18:56:00.000+08:00

题目没错，不是达芬奇密码，我要说的是达芬奇的蛋蛋。

最近比较颓废，临睡前总会想起小时候学习的励志故事来激励自己，同时也积攒一下人品。这些故事包括，“毛泽东小时候分柴火”，“爱因斯坦不会做沙发”，“列宁怒摔姨妈家花瓶”，还有“罗永浩家院子里的樱桃树”。当然，我也知道“金日成打飞机”的故事，不过据说那是朝鲜课本的了。最近一个想起来的是达芬奇画鸡蛋的故事。

故事很简单，毕竟是小学的课文的文章。用Google搜索 “达芬奇鸡蛋”，就可以看到好多结果。就不在这里转述了。

这个故事是在我学画之前就知道了，导致我学画的时候就挺纳闷：老师咋不给俺个鸡蛋让我画呢？也跟达芬奇他老师一样，每次过去就给一个红芯鸭蛋，不重样地让我画。然后我肯定比达芬奇的悟性还好，一下就看出这是老师培养我观察能力。结果老师总是拿一些几何体让我画，圆柱啊，圆锥啊，棱锥啊，长方体，正方体，最有难度的要算球了。跟达芬奇老师对比一下，这样的培养下，我能画出个球啊？所以，我一直以为，我人生跟达芬奇的差距，就在几个鸡蛋。

今天上班，刚好赶上周一，我的一周综合症又发作了。就在上班时候去寻找达芬奇的蛋蛋，心想，现在我也学过数列了，也看过达芬奇编码了，应该不会难到我了。Google一下这个故事的英文版本，搜索了"Da Vinci Egg"，没有找到结果。找到他老师的名字Verrocchio加进去，也是一样。完全不像搜索中文版故事那样简单。wikipedia上面也没有这么八卦，甚至找到文艺复兴时期的Vasari给达芬奇写的传记，也没有这样的内容。

郁闷呀：有啥方法，能考证达芬奇的蛋蛋，毛泽东的柴火，爱因斯坦的沙发还有罗永浩家的樱桃树呢？

种树 & 养猪

2007-04-12T21:32:00.000+08:00

上周末，走马观花的到杭州玩了半天，下午又转战西溪湿地。我感觉西溪湿地这地方很好玩，那是一些被水隔离开的小陆地。水多陆少，乃地球之具体而微者。看到这个地区的平面图，也不难总结出小陆板块漂移学说（Aha! Had they ever fit together?!)。在这地方的游览方式，就是拿着在湿地公园买的旧船票，登上一艘20人的破船，抢到一个靠船边上的位子（记住务必一定要抢到靠窗上的位置！)，看着外面的水发呆，然后到一个村子的码头停下来，大家下船，绕小陆一周，然后赶紧跑回码头，出示旧船票，上破船，抢位置，再到下一个村子……

在船上的时候，会有一位涉世不深的当地年轻导游姑娘来讲解湿地的情况，指导来自城里的乘客认识一些水鸟之类的。也会提到一些当地的乡土风情。当游船从一个狭小的流域转向到一片宽阔的水域时（相当于地球的太平洋），导游姑娘熟练的感叹道，“……真是山穷水复疑无路，柳暗花明又一村，这就是村里在端午节赛龙舟的地方，大家也可以看到村口那三棵粗壮的香樟树……我们这边的习俗，是家里生了姑娘就要种一棵香樟树，当姑娘嫁人的时候，要砍掉当嫁妆……大家知道，香樟树是不容易长的很粗装的，我们村口这三棵却都是很大的香樟树……”，也许这时，她忽然注意到了乘客们不约而同疑惑并富有求知欲的表情，解释说“当然，这也不是说这三棵树的家的女儿嫁不出去呀……”。

今天把这段故事，讲给别人听，马上又得到一个反馈问题，就是生男孩要有什么仪式……我幽幽的思考了一下，回答说“我想，大概是养猪吧”。因为我想，村口的大树，至少说明了计划生育对于生女孩子是‘少生孩子多种树’，对于男孩就应该‘少生孩子多养猪了’”

革命奋斗纲领

2007-03-23T18:49:00.000+08:00

又好久没来写东西，上次写都是去年的事儿了。虽然没写东西，我的blog却经历了从政府不允许到允许再回到不允许的过程。为纪念这个回归，我有了些写些东西的愿望。

昨天看到论坛里面有人分享自己的理想什么什么的。这个问题可是比较难，从小的时候，就没少被教育要竖立远大的理想。可是到现在，一直也没有给我树立起来，从这一点来说，党对我的教育是失败的。

回想去年10.1前，有一次拓展训练。动员大会上，就给发了张大白纸，还有几支笔。都听说拓展有危险，我第一反应就是这时要签生死状了。后来一解释才明白，每个人要用画画的方法做一个自我介绍，描述一下自己的昨天、今天和明天——也就是过去、现在和将来了。我如实画了自己的过去，和现在的情况，可是到了将来的部分，可把我难住了，为了掩饰自己的胸无大志，我在将来的部分，画了一个"x"。意思是，一切皆有可能，解释权归读者。

第二天，就需要每个人把自己的画解释一下。解释的过程中，我发现，我们公司那些负责干活，没有读过大学的小妹们的目标都很明确，过去是住宿舍，现在租公寓，将来自己买房子；或者是过去走路上班，现在骑了自行车，以后要开上车。而读过大学的，大多比较飘渺：自己原来是火，现在是风，以后要当水；自己原来是温水等死蛙，现在想明白了，今后要变成开水跳蛙……最不靠普的就是我这个模型了，把未来跟一个字母等价起来。

读的书越多，怎么就越来越对目标不明确。要是生活在以前，也不读什么书，每个人都制订个“农妇，山泉，有点儿田”的革命奋斗纲领，社会是不是也挺和谐。

高中读书的时候，老师曾经提到过鲁迅描述某些人的理想是“ 在雪天，呕上半口血，由丫鬟搀扶着，懒懒的到院子里看梅花”。王小波也曾经评论过，对于这种想法的人，他唯一帮得上忙的就是令其呕呕血了。不过现在我看来，这句话倒是有那么点成为我样不靠谱人的奋斗纲领的潜质。或者有那么一种调调。

经过一番过度阐释之后，我认为产生这调调的原因是：

呕上半口血 -- 身体不好，可能是年纪大了
有丫鬟 -- 统治阶级
到院子里面 -- 有产阶级
还能懒懒的看梅花 -- 看来是不用为吃喝发愁，也有医保，房贷也想必按揭还完了

基本上可以看出，这句话描述的是一个离休老干部的晚年生活了——忙了大辈子革命工作，也该歇歇了……

Rocky's Theory of Relativity

2006-08-23T19:38:00.000+08:00

工作一年有余，虽无事业进展，但略有所思总结工作相对论，如下：

（注：本理论很大程度上来自Amang的confession: 一天什么都不干，过的也挺快）

1. 什么都不做的时候，时间过的相对要慢。
when you do nothing at work, 8 hour is relativly damn diffcult to kill.

2. 在投入工作的时候，时间过的相对要快。
when you busy working your ass off, time is passing realtivly fast.

3. 在投入工作无关事情的时候，时间过的比2中相对要快。
when you spend your work time on irrelative stuffs, you'll find the preciousness of time.

本相对论的意义在于“增加负罪快感的同时，解释相对时间过快的疑问。”

四平八稳、理直气壮

2005-10-23T20:02:00.000+08:00

“你怎么不写blog，有好多话要说呢”，一位同事在我询问她关于她的blog之后如是说。我一边在向他解释blogspot现阶段还不能为我国政府所接纳，一边也在想，真的有好多的话要说呢。

我似乎还没有记录过我工作后感想，这并不是我没有感想，而是来上海之后，有了太多的感想，却乱了头绪，无从下笔。总的来讲，在上海的工作生活还是顺利的。工作的工资虽然不高，毕业前所幻想的小康生活也没有真正的降临，不过却活得四平八稳、理直气壮。主要是心情还算是舒畅，可能是我还没有遇到工作的人所分享经验中那些无奈。

企鹅的三月 & 阿May的第一次

2005-08-19T12:17:00.000+08:00

昨夜，在买洗涤剂的途中遭遇大雨，在街边避雨的时候发现一家音像品小店（上海这样的小店比比皆是），顺便购得 "Le Marche de l'empereur" DVD一张。回去用笔记本试了一下，除了前面一些Disney & Pixar的广告令我感到厌烦以外，其余还都还好。看了大约有十分钟的时间，大概知道了这个电影的主旨是什么，因为，电影中的旁白已经说明了这是关于企鹅的Marche的记录。我不懂法语，但是Marche的发音却与英文March很像，我听得很清楚。

今天中午，浏览DVD碟报的网站上，发现有对这张DVD的介绍，顺手打开来看，竟然叫做《企鹅的三月》——想必一定是March还有"三月"的意思造成的。我想看看这个翻译究竟影响到了多少人，于是Google了一下"企鹅的三月"，结果出乎意料，连新华网也这样介绍，我想可能使我错了。因为上面还赫然有着对三月的十分合理的解释：

...每年的三月，南极企鹅就进入了求偶时期，为了找到合适的配偶建立一个...

不得不找IMDB求证一下，结果还好，电影的International English Title是The Emperor's Journey，这样才长出一口气。

我想，翻译者也不是一无是处的，因为他没有把电影翻译成"皇帝的三月"，再加上一个"每年三月，皇帝就要选妾，太监们忙着..." 这样一个看似合理的解释。我想，在这一点上，也要归功于封面设计，DVD封面上的那只企鹅，一定是帮助翻译者找到了不少的灵感，最后得到了"企鹅"的结论。

不过，无论怎样误用、错用、滥用，NVM(刚学到这是NeverMind的缩写)，只要大家习惯就好。正如我们古代有通假字，现代又把“阈值”跟“阀值”等同，Half-Life也翻译为"半条命"。

这样我联想《三联生活周刊》杂志的专栏上的一篇文章《阿May的第一次》：

作为一个中年人，5月份里的一个好天气有时会令我想到 BeeGee's的一支老歌，First of May，可直译为“5月1日”或者“5月初”。17岁时候，这歌听得我泪流满面。其实它是作为70年代初的一部电影《两小无猜》（Melody）的插曲一插而红的。电影讲的是“小学生早恋”的故事，套用今天的流行文化术语，可归类于“青春剧”。但是，对于今天的年轻人来说，“早恋”早就不算劲爆，最起码已无法成为一部商业影片的卖点。更能说明问题的是，最近我在地铁车厢里见到一位正在漫不经心地讲着手机的花季女生，并且窃听到她正在将这支纯情到发疯的情歌向对方解读为“阿May的第一次”。

Einmal Shanghai

2005-08-03T15:37:00.000+08:00

Been in this city for half a month, but I haven't got enough time to experience the city, on the other hand, the city is so huge to explore, however, I have some shallow poionts of the city to share.

Last Friday evening, I went to the Wai-Tan beach of Huangpujiang River. It was crowded and the sight is not so good as I expected. Though, the fireworks cheers me up a little, I considered it a welcome ceremony for me:D. One of my friends said at he wanted to own the city watching Wai-Tan in the evening, while I hadn't got that ambition, I just wanted to be part of the city.

I am a new guy in this town, my existences here might have nothing to do with this city and most people here, but for me there would be a lot of "first time" to discovery, to explore.

Im Leavin' on a Jetplane

2005-07-13T12:19:00.000+08:00

早上，打电话定了18号的机票，没想到很快机票就被送过来。机票拿到手，有些感慨，在这里的日子也不多了。在哈尔滨生活了25年，只是在离别前才发现她的好——而这些恰恰是我原来所忽视的－－也许是只缘身在此山中的缘故罢。25年的生活中，这个城市给了我什么，我不清楚。需要换一个环境，从其他的角度来回顾这段时间我所被给予的。

现在的感觉是矛盾的，一方面，眷恋着哈尔滨的好，另一方面，却向往着在上海开始新的生活。毕业前，后者的感觉要比前者强烈的多，前者虽然有，但大都是为赋新词式的。而毕业后，前一种感觉却不知不觉地占据了大脑。欲走还留，似乎是许多告别这个城市的人的心态。

CD中播放着Matthew Lien的Bressnone，我原本以为，这首歌在远行前送给家乡的姑娘，是一件妙事，它为即将离别的人所写，也带走了我的思绪：

....
you will be a sweet surrender,
I must go the other way,
and my train will carry me onward,
though my heart will surely stay.
....

Graduation

2005-07-09T14:33:00.000+08:00

Finally got my MS degree

电梯里的女人

2005-06-15T18:46:00.000+08:00

我所在的这幢楼，虽然不矮，但却只有一个电梯。电梯能够起到运输的作用之余，同时也成功地为社会解决了一个就业岗位。我想，如果当初楼的设计师能够多设计出几个电梯来，他便可以多做些好事了。

刚来这幢楼的时候，便看到电梯上放赫然写着“八楼以下学生禁乘”，我虽然是学生，要去的是五楼，但是想这时间也没有人坐电梯，况且手里拎着些东西，坐坐也无妨吧。电梯开门后，一个孤零零坐着的女人凸现出来，不到四十岁的样子，人很瘦小，跟她坐的那张大木椅子形成了鲜明的对比。我有些感到诧异，具体的感觉可能跟阿拉丁擦过神灯一样，我她坐在电梯操作按钮的前面，想必她便是“八楼以下学生禁乘”的贯彻者吧。我有些心虚，但还是镇定地走了进去。她抬头打量了我一下，便问我，“到几楼？”，我犹豫了一下“五楼”，她跟着也犹豫了一下，然后按下了五楼的电钮，接着抑扬顿挫的说“五楼以下不准坐电梯”。我回了句，“我不清楚这里的规定”，她说“一楼电梯口不写着么？”随后便无话，电梯徐徐升到了五楼。

以后，我便不怎么坐电梯了，除非看到那个女人在收发室里面扯话，我才能偷偷溜过去，体会一下上上下下的感觉。间或有同学朋友来找我，也总会提起电梯中的女人。也有人说电梯中的女人对他们的态度恶劣、粗暴、白眼相加。我则解释给他们，她是我们这幢楼的CEO，所以才会这样。CEO?对，Chief Elevator Operator。然后朋友们则会会意地点点头。

一次在网上，看到一个关于电梯的恐怖故事，想把它实现一番——在没人使用电梯的时候，唤出电梯来，如果不出意料的话，那里面将只有一个人。然后，用迷茫的眼神打量着电梯中没人的地方，再用失望的口气小声自言自语（但却足以让别人听到）“好多人呐，走楼梯好了”，然后镇定的走向楼梯方向，直至电梯门关上--可我终究没有去实现它，一个是已经过了玩tricks的年龄，再一个是这样着实不好。我想不管那个电梯中的职位是否是有意义，是否合理，是否应该取缔，CEO只是尽到了她的职责。不能再办公室办公，而只能在电梯中办公，我想对于哪个CEO都已经不是一件幸运的事儿了。

Fading Characters

2005-06-05T16:02:00.000+08:00

Painted on the wall is "Long live the Chinese Comunist Party".
I took this picture on May 1st, at Daowai - The old neighbourhood of Harbin.

三让

2005-05-29T15:38:00.000+08:00

第一次听到“三让”，是两天之前，“三让”？“车让人，人让车，车让车”，是哈尔滨交通部门最新的口号。不成想在这几天坐公共汽车的路上，看到路中央的栏杆上挂满了推行“三让”的标语。

听到“三让”后，作为一个计算机工作者，本能的意识到“三让”里面存在着死锁。死锁是什么？我高考备考的时候读过一篇阅读，说一位荷兰科学家解释死锁为 “5个哲学家围坐在圆桌吃饭，每个人手里面拿着一支筷子，结果谁都吃不了饭”——那篇文章的本意是人们对哲学的不理解。读了大学之后，才知道那位荷兰科学家是Dijkstra，而Dining Philosophers，也是操作系统课本上的必修内容。

不知道那位提出“三让”伟大构想的人，是从哪里来。不过确实有三块表能让我们的奶牛多产奶，煤矿多出煤，能让我们的神州号上天，还能让我们的运动员取得好的比赛成绩--这都是权威的CCTV证实的。看来三让也不是没有理论依据，想必不久，我们的“三让”也一定会在哈尔滨的各个新闻媒体中喜报频传的。

说到这儿，我又想起了高中时候的一些事情，高中的时候我们有所谓的“劳动教育周”，在这一周，一个班级的学生不用上课，但是也没有好事等着，一周的时间为全校同学打扫卫生。我高中的班级是八班，我不知道为什么一些好事都是从一班开始最后到八班，而坏事总是从八班开始最后到一班。我们班级有幸在这样的活动中走在了最前面，班级干部的积极性也颇高。只是管理者不知道如何去制定劳动的强度，最开始，学校所有的劳动，包括每一个班级的饭盒都是由一个班来送和取得 ——以我亲身经历而言，这项工作是很繁重的。劳动周中，又提出了“三净”的要求（后来几个学期，似乎又加入了“三静”和“三敬”），“三净”的具体内容我已经记不清楚了，大概是地板要干净-大理石的地方要见光，楼梯扶手要干净-金属栏杆的部分要见光，还有一个什么要干净我记不清楚了，但是依稀的记得某些地方还是要见光的。我现在怀疑，是不是这个“三净”跟“三光”有什么联系。随着劳动教育周进行，政策也变化了，不需要为每个班的人送饭框了，因为有人反映，一个班级送饭太慢，这样中午太饿了，最后干脆送饭都是班级自己的事情了。到第四周时，劳动强度已经降低了好多，可惜我们那时候已经不再劳动周中了，我们没有享受过别人给送饭的服务。第四周过后，学校组织下乡劳动——到农村去，这次是从一班、二班开始。农村根本没有什么活，一班二班的同学去的几天也赶上下雨，根本没有干活，给我的感觉，就像现在的户外俱乐部组织的大型农家饭腐败活动一样。这样的活动学校也只办了一次，可能是农村那边的反应不太好，后来文理分科我转到二班，听二班的同学口述以及我的凭空想象，大概他们当时是受了“三光”政策的影响。

上面有些跑题了，我们继续来三让。“人让车，车让人，车让车”，表面看是好的，体现了我们礼仪之邦的气度，但却经不起推敲——总不能让个没完没了，那样还要什么交通。最后，为了保证交通，还是先要有一个“当仁不让”的。再有，如果交通规则存在的话，自然会解释什么时候人该让车，什么时候车该让人，什么时候车该让车，交通规则不就是让交通避免进入这“三让”的困境之中的么？依我看来，“三让”应该叫做“不三让”或者“三不让”才更合理一些。或许“三让”的目的是让公民有更好的交通道德意识？但这种方法仍然来的不厚道，就像其他的Tips一样，它们光给出了怎么做，却不说为什么要这样做。（当然，三块代表不再我批判其中，我相信，经过了这么久时间的全国学习，每一块表都能有无数报告、会议、讲话、心得、体会来诠释的）。所以，让这些“五讲四美三热爱两个基本点一个中心”来的更少一些吧。

photos taken at Songhua river

2005-05-25T19:24:00.000+08:00

nap

sisters

I havn't expected the "Hello" would work, but i did work.

Naming & Creativity

2005-05-19T17:57:00.000+08:00

Naming, is no doubt an activity challenging the human creativity. unlike activies like art, music, literature which are the privileges of small groups, naming is an activity partcipate by most people. We name things, more or less. At least, like it or not, we are given names when we are born. Naming is hard, though we have almost contributed everyone's brain cells to it, the status quo hasn't changed a little.

I have to admit I have difficulty with naming too. When i write programs, there's alwasy one thing makes me headache - giving names to variables. Same thing happend when I was chosing an English name for myself. Name, in my opinion, should firstly be sound, acceptable by most people - Weird name is not serious, respectful and responsible enough. On the other hand, name should be distinctive. It's sometime shameful to duplicate another's name. naming itself is contradictive.

I sufferd from naming - my name is abused, I have met 4 people with the same name as mine, seen my name printed on the newspaper which is not mine, and there are 1,750,000 search results of my name in Google. wait, can i call it "my name" again?. I shouldn't have complained too much about my name, this is a historical issue. what can i do is try to stop the tragedy happening again.

What I cannot agree with is re-name some good names. "Zongshan Road" can be found in nearly all the big cities of China, and there are also numerous "Beijing Street", "Yan'an Road", "People's Square", "Liberation Road". I don't believe they were built with these names. They are renamed - in order to show the creativity inside the brain cells of the people from a nation with great population.

中国式结婚

2005-04-18T09:51:00.000+08:00

最近有一部改编自小说的电视剧《中国式离婚》被炒得很火--其实也不是最近的事情了，大概也是有一年的光景了。没有亲自看过，只是碰巧在做出租的时候，听到电台中对这部电视剧（或是小说）的评述 -- 随着光阴流逝，婚姻在夫妻之间慢慢瓦解，并不需要第三者的参与。

对于中国式离婚，我还没有发言权，不过对于结婚，昨天却亲自经历了一次“中国式结婚”，准确地说，是“中国式婚礼”，更准确一些，是参加了同学的中国式婚礼。

活了二十多年，参加了无数次的婚礼，才发现中国式的婚礼很怪异——它不是传统的，因为新郎新娘以及在婚礼中需要些体面的人穿的都是西式服装，婚礼中又要奏一下婚礼进行曲。它也不是西式的，婚礼的典礼是在酒店而非教堂进行，典礼的主持不是牧师，而正堂上就座的则是男女双方高堂。

这样的婚礼的习俗似乎刚刚开始不久——我没有去深入考究——因为父母那一代的婚礼还是非常朴素的，没有这样的排场。不过在我看来，这样的中国式婚礼就是对人的一种折磨。

首先说新人吧，新郎穿着笔挺的西装，新娘穿着考究的婚纱。这都是为了给人透露出一种尊严和高贵。为什么偏偏要让些这新人被那些司仪羞辱一番，被喊着号子鞠躬。典礼结束后呢，还要拿着酒杯到各个桌子敬上一杯——虽然这有水分。再说宾客，婚宴无论丰盛与否都是要上到桌上来的，不吃呢肯定是对主人的不敬，吃吧，可是就着那台上的乐队的奏乐，以及业余歌手的演出，真是难以下咽。司仪呢，耍了一天的嘴皮子，也刁难了新郎与新娘子，但却难以产生一点满足感，回家后，拿着婚礼主人给的分红，肯定心理在吗：这钱，真TMD难赚。

结婚本来应该时间让人高兴的事儿，不应该把人搞得这样疲惫。

Peacock

2005-03-07T15:09:00.000+08:00

I watched the movie "Peacock" last week, i found myself like it. The movie is about a family lived in 70s in a small town in Henan, China. The family had five members, Father, mother, tow sons and a daughter. These children are in their 20s and they have thier own dreams, of course. The movie tells the stories - those mementos of the three children, peacefully. It feels a little bitter to see how one's dreams, ambitions became vanished.

We used to have dreams, hopes when we are still young, take myself as an example, i'd always wanted to live in europ for sometime, i want to learn to speak French, German, I wanted to learn to play guita, I wanted to be a good photographer, and I wanted a kind and lovely wife.....

Im not yonger anymore, after watching the film, i was a bit worry about my dreams.

Picture of Changshou Shan

2005-03-02T19:04:00.000+08:00

Changshou Palace

I got this picture days ago, i was shot by me in Jan 30th, using my friend's EOS 30. Then he got back to Beijing in Feb 20th, and then scanned this film for me.

Boring Vacation

2005-02-11T12:18:00.000+08:00

I've been reading some books during the Chinese New Year, cause I have nothing else to do:)

I finished reading a novel "Wolf Totem" by Jiang Rong and another two books by Wim Wenders "Einmal: Bild und Geschten" and "Die Zeit Mit Antonnioni". And an impressive book "My Spiritual Home" by Chinese Writer Wang Xiaobo.

"My Spiritual Home" is a collection of essays by Wang Xiaobo, published after his death in 1997. I've heard Wang before, but never had read his essays. Even though, I have heard a lot of words from his essays, like "The Major Silencers" . I've finished the culture part of his essay collection, found that it's not easy to put this book aside. His words in the essays was simple, pure but powerful, or more exactly, his idea was insightful. Appearantly, his early life has much influnced by the CR, his western experience also made him an independent thinker. He was oppsed to the mind imprisonment, which is still one of China's problem.

After I looked him up in the internet, I found him not listed in wikipedia english edition, so I created a wikipedia page for him.

the need for speed

2005-01-30T19:12:00.000+08:00

just back from skiing. that was the first skiing experience for me, although i slipped for countless times and had my right ear frostbited, still found it interesting.

i went to "wanshoushan" ski resort. it was a newly-built and large one, very near to harbin, about 1 hour and a half drive. so, it's much more convenient than most of the resorts near by.

after a simple breakfast, i went out of the hotel with rented ski equipments, and have my first slip as soon as i armed myslef with the equipments and made a move. have i mentioned im a smart learner? LOL. I learned(i prefer "invented", haha) to walk after the first slip.

there were several ski runs for different skiers, of coz, i choose the beginners' . i try to ski down at the middle of the run. it isn't a great speed when comming down. then, i begin to ski form higher and higher positions. as the speed increase, it became more exciting. the exciting just lasts for tens of second, experienceing the speed.

i planned to take 1 hour skiing and 1 hour photographing, but i spent 2 hours more skiing. ski is more interesting than i thought.

Almsdeed Show

2005-01-22T20:25:00.000+08:00

later on, there're quite some almsdeed shows in order to help the people sufferd from tsunami. stars showed up, and gether denotions.

i just heard a news on TV, there's a almsdeed fashion show in Heilongjiang univercity held today in order to help 15 poor student could not afford the traffic fee back home in the vacation. im not sure about this, wheather it's almsdeed or it's a more show. The student in heilongjiang univercity usually came from heilongjiang province, and their traffic fee will not cost so much to held a almsdeed show. and the cost of the show itself maybe will not be cheaper that. so i really doubt about this.

but this remind me something happend years ago. it was a winter night, one of my roommate, who was monitor of the class, came back late, after enter the root, he took out 100rmb and sent it to another roomate - Zhenyu, said "she returned the money back to you, she said she wouldn't get back home wasn't due to lack of money". on hearing this, i knew Zhenyu was about to help a girl on his class silently, although they are not close friends. This made me feel the life is more beautiful than before.

Like a Startled Bird

2005-01-19T12:19:00.000+08:00

Zhao Ziyang, the purged leader of CCP died on monday. he was quite a controversial people. offically he was accuesd of "splitting the party" by supporting anti-revolution rebellion, at the same time he was considered as a reformer on both economy and politics.

I hardly know Zhao before I entered to the college, I've got to know him since I read something about the '89 incident. I was still in my elementary school in the year 89, and knew nothing about the democratic campaign, and got my little brain washed by the local media. I was moved by the pure patriotic from the student calling for democracy in 89. I mean the mass students, except those chasing for personal benefits. So, I sympathize with those students, as well as Zhao.

I was very disapointed at what the goverment did after Zhao's death. No obituary by the CCTV news, only serval words was released by Xinhua news. and public memorial was forbidden. and since yesterday, some internet bbs and forums are shutdown.

maybe the goverment was so nevers about Zhao's death, casue the '89 indicent was triggered by Hu yaobang's death -- they are still not confident enough to face their own people.

Happiest Day as an Inter Fan

2005-01-10T16:00:00.000+08:00

Last night, i was watch football on tv with my friends. the game shown on tv was Livorno vs Juventus. frankly, i really don't care about his match, im not fan of the either side. what i cared was the score shown on tv about another match procedding at the same time. It was Sapordoria vs Inter.

Inter hasn't been beatean this season, but rarely win. the results lies mostly in drawn. so Inter's not on top of the table. And a series of win is badly needed in order to bridge the gap from juven and milan. But unfortunately, after the 1st half, the score was: sampor1 : 0 inter. I was a little worried about inter, but not that much. because we used to equlized in the 2nd half. at 70 min on the 2nd half, bad news came that inter lose anther goal. At that time, i really don't think we can get the match win, even equlized. But miracle happend, at the end of the match, the commenter said inter has equalized in that match, and it was not over yet. After the add, Jianxiang Huang said, miracle happned at San Siro. Inter had won the math with 3-2. I was excited hearing the news.

Today's sports news about inter reports paised this miracle. and the player, Martins, Recoba and Vieri. it was their goals and sprit made this super-comeback.

"it was the happies day in my career" said Vieri, and I think this's my happies as an inter fan.

Reconciliation

2005-01-09T18:27:00.000+08:00

i've got "reconciled" with a former close friend, well, actually i had been a chaser of her since years ago. i blocked her the time i knew she'd got a b/f, who was also a close friend of mine and had another g/f at the same time. days ago i unblocked her from my msn contract list, so we can have a "normal" conversation. I blocked her partly because, just as she said, "out of sight, out of mind", i thought i need time to get myself to get it over.

"I thought we were not going to be friends again." she told me online, after i promised her i would welcome her at shanghai after i go to work in july, " I've never expected to get your welcome there."

"Well," She continued, "I'd like to tell you what i'd been longly want to say to you, since we are friends again...We had been friends for years, I didn't mean to hurt anyone. However, you and me, we are so different anyway, and you'd always been so kind to me, i could not say it out... In fact, i could feel it after the Changbaishan trip. but you told me you didn't want me to miss a better one -- girls wouldn't think this way. I think we missed each other when we considered each other are the best, and once missed, we'll never back again...You are definitly a good guy, you are the prince in many gals' mind. So, never lose a chance again, be confident, you are the best, even if you failed, you'll not feel regreted..."

I apprieciated for her sincere words. Although i did't make any senseful reply, i really felt, at this time, i can come to term with the facts.

I liked this girl, and now i know she liked me too, but i never took the first step, and missed the chance. However, if we were together, im still not sure of the future of us. I had some considerations at that time. First, we're different in many ways, in fact, i cannot understand her well, her style of dealling with stuffs. I might disagree on her in many ways. I don't want to force her to change her style, neither i wanted to change my thoughts. Second, I'd always dreaming a career in other cities, if she could go with me, Im sure she will have a tough life with meat the beginning, i don't want her to suffer. Or, I choose to stay here not to move, this is a really sweet surrender...

I am perfectionism, which makes conderations. these considerations make me hesitated, and hesitation prohibits me taking any action. This is a major weekness of my personality. And I consider her perfectionism too. Once, my high-school teacher, Ms Fu, said to me(she saw though my mind), she thought she(the girl) and i would have made a good couple, because she and i are both perfectionism. But perfectionism made us not being a couple, too.

I like the movie "Beyond the Clouds" very much, especially the first story. Because i find myself in that story.

Looking Forward

2004-12-26T13:46:00.000+08:00

It was Winter Solstice yesterday, in which day, the day is the shortest in the year. In other word, days are becoming langer from today.

The "Winter Solstice" really means the arrival of winer, but i'd like to consider it as the sign of leaving, though it will become colder in the following days.

My great job-hunting era has gone, LOL, but the next era will not be any easier. However, i would like to torture Gorky's famous "Petrel".

"im looking forward for you coming", wrote My furture colleague, "well, me too", I replied.

Old Friend

2004-12-22T13:50:00.000+08:00

I meat my deskmate yesterday, we haven't meat each other for 8 more years. and it's really amazing experience to meat an old friend.

She had been my deskmate for one semester, in the last year of my Junior middle. And she was my last female deskmate, hehehe. i'd totally lost contract with her since graduate from junior middle, so are most of my classmates.

She said i hadn't changed much, since she can easily recognized me. well so she had. the significant change from apperance is i ware a pair of glasses while she took them off. but inside, i don't know how much we've changed or matured.

FIFO - First In First Offer

2004-12-03T13:51:00.000+08:00

i had a interview with huawei-3com the other day, at the second round, they asked me for desired working locations. and i told them i wanted a position in beijing. they answered there were no positions available in beijing left. and then, they regreted to tell me(or pretended to be regretful), coversation has came to it end. "we'll notify you if we have new position."

later did i hear that beijing offers have been given out before i got interviewed. well, when i heard this news, i could help saying "what the f***!", ( well, actually i said "wo kao" in chinese).

i guess there're quite lot computer engineers in huawei-3com, and they are very fond of the data structure called "queue", which is FIFO( First In First Out). and they modified it, applied it to their recruiment process, that is First In First Offer, hehehe.

To Sign or not to Sign

2004-12-01T13:04:00.000+08:00

finally, i decided not to sign ZTE.

though they can provide a sound salary, working postion in shanghai and a beautiful promise of personal career.

ZTE is not my first choice, if i sign a contract with ZTE today, then, my be i'll break the contract because the involing of my dream company.

it'll be a hurt to both sides if the contract was reneged. i don't want to hurt any one, or being hurt by anyone. and if i don't sign, others might get chance to thier dreaming ZTE.

I found it more and more simliar between hunting a job and finding a g/f. --easy man get easy jobs. easy girls get laid by easy guys. hehehe

Killing me softly

2004-11-17T15:31:00.000+08:00

In days of job hunting, it's often a nice thing to see new emails appears in email inbox. Even junk mails look less disgusting than they used to be. And emails form company you applied will make you really excited.

I got a incoming mail in the afternoon. Titled "Thank you from xxxxx!"("xxxxx" refered to a company i applied months ago). Ha, i must be a interview notification, I assummed. I could not help opening it. written in the email:

Dear Sir:
Thank you for giving us the opportunity to review your resume and qualification.

Not really, you are welcome, haha.

It is regretted that we have a very limited number of postings for which a large number of candidates are applying....

Aha, well

Your application has been reviewed along with other applicants. While we are impressed with your qualification, we can not offer you job with xxxxx.

So?

Please understand that this is not a negative evaluation of your accomplishment, but rather a reflection of our unique hiring needs.

Look, they are consoling me :(

Thank you very much for your interest with xxxxx. Wish you every success in locating a challenging career opportunity in the future.

What should I say, I guess i should only say, well, thank you, too.

Compromise?

2004-11-08T15:38:00.000+08:00

Last Saturday, i was rejected by a local firm, get rejected in my first interview, it should be depressing. And more or less, I think I am depressed.

The first two rounds of interview was going on well, and i think those who gave me the interview was quite good at techniques. so i think in this way, i had like this firm someway. but in the third round, i was given a interview by a gal from their HR department. I think i was a little arrogant then, so i get rejected.

The most disaggreement was working location. i don't like Shenzhen, but the company was only supplying jobs their. i don't compromise, and actted arrogantly.

Anyway, I get some experience and i think i can do well next time. and i get depressed mostly because it was they rejected me, not I rejected them.

不可撤销

2004-09-14T15:42:00.000+08:00

上周三终于结束了开题报告的答辩，这之前的一周多的准备累加上在这之后接近一周的喘息，回头看上一篇Blog已经是半个月之前的事情了，终于今天才有兴致上来，写一写Blog，廖表一点专业的精神，以致这个月的Blog不至于太过稀疏。

其实也不是所有的研究生都这样的紧张，几个朋友的教研室都是可以非常轻松的通过开题的。甚至开题报告、答辩的slides也不用太多的准备。而我的开题报告写了12000多字，还是不能让老板在数量上满意，不过数量并不能说明问题，至多代表着态度还算端正。Damn It!为什么当初选择这样一个实验室。选择其他的一个地方稳稳当当的毕业多好。不过我毕竟不是最郁闷的，比起那些题目基本上被否定的兄弟，我也算是没有太多理由来抱怨了。而且，抱怨也是不能解决任何问题的。

曾经看过《不可撤销》那部电影，虽然里面充斥着暴力色情，使得这部电影在嘎纳放映的时候，影评人员没有坚持看完，不过这部电影所传达的就是事情就是一环扣一环的发展下来，无法撤销，无法去修改环环之间所做出的选择，也就是没处买后悔药。

人的一生似乎可以完美的使用有限自动机来进行建模，每一个阶段，就是一个状态，状态之间的转移。从细粒度的模型出发，前一阶段我的状态可以描绘为 State:{opening report}然后，不久就会是State:{job hunting}了:)。还好还好，我们还能在状态转换的过程中提供一些选择的策略，避免宿命的发生。这样，一个明智的选择，会对将来的状态起到很大的影响。举例来说，如果我当初没有选择哈尔滨工业大学，也许就不会在这里为开题报告犯愁了，hehehe。

不过做选择也是很痛苦的。这多少是因为选择是“不可撤销”的，或者，乐观的一点，不是那么好撤销的:D。这就是为什么《Trainspotting》里面用非常厌烦的的语气来读这段工整的排比句了“Choose Life. Choose a job. Choose a career. Choose a family. Choose a fucking big television....”。

马上要到来的job hunting状态让我有些紧张，也有一些无奈。我前几天还在劝慰一个同学要“放开眼光，毫不犹豫，不要后悔”，放在自己身上，这些话好像还真要多多思量。

Wise Up！

hat man die Fische, so vergisst man die Reusen.

2004-08-31T15:49:00.000+08:00

Fischreusen sind da um der Fische willen;
hat man die Fische, so vergisst man die Reusen.

Hasenschlingen sind da um der Hasen willen;
hat man die Hasen, so vergisst man die Schlingen.

Worte sind da um der Gedanken willen;
hat man den Gedanken, so vergisst man die Worte.

Wo finde ich einen Menschen,
der die Worte vergisst,
auf dass ich mit ihm reden kann.

Second Name

2004-08-31T15:46:00.000+08:00

The other day, When I was sending a book(The Spirit of Chinese People) as a gift to a professor of CMU, who was giving a lecture in HIT, He asked me to sign my English Name on it. After I sighed "John", he also wanted a second name, I said "I'm sorry I havn't got a second English name." If it had happend today, I'll sign my second name as Rock, yes, John Rock.

My Chinese name Yan means Rock, so that it comes naturally. Why havn't I thought out of that before?

Well, The Next section is a song, I Am A Rock, sorry for getting the lyrics only.

A winter's day
In a deep and dark December;
I am alone,
Gazing from my window to the streets below
On a freshly fallen silent shroud of snow.
I am a rock,
I am an island.

I've built walls,
A fortress deep and mighty,
That none may penetrate.
I have no need of friendship; friendship causes pain.
It's laughter and it's loving I disdain.
I am a rock,
I am an island.

Don't talk of love,
But I've heard the words before;
It's sleeping in my memory.
I won't disturb the slumber of feelings that have died.
If I never loved I never would have cried.
I am a rock,
I am an island.

I have my books
And my poetry to protect me;
I am shielded in my armor,
Hiding in my room, safe within my womb.
I touch no one and no one touches me.
I am a rock,
I am an island.

And a rock feels no pain;
And an island never cries.

老板永远不会错

2004-08-31T15:44:00.000+08:00

今天和导师讨论了关于开题的事情，发现，导师所想的和我所想的完全是两码事。导师的理解跟我的理解有很大的偏差。从我的角度上来看，导师的理解是不全面、不准确的。我试图将我的想法讲给他听，结果却被否定。看来我前几天所做的工作全部都是去了意义。唉，为了毕业，只能如此。

不免联想起成功经理人讲座中，于老板的告诫：

老板永远不会错
如果发现老板错，一定是我看错
如果我没有看错，一定是因为我的错，才害老板犯错
即使是他自己的错，只要老板不承认有错，他就没错
如果老板不认错，我还坚持他有错，那就是我的错
总之，老板不会有错，这句话不会错

虽然罗嗦，但是重复会加深记忆，不是么？

这套不会错的模版倒是比较好用，我看到一个人做了一个简单的字符替换，将“老板”替换为“老婆”，将“他”替换为“她”。这样，一个新的不会错的告诫便产生了。

a box of chocolate

2004-08-30T15:52:00.000+08:00

The Athens 2004 Olympics is over, China has won 32 Golds, which is a historical highest. Therefore, several days before, many maintained that China would win no more than 25, for China team fails on many of its superior games. We made mistakes on Gyms but we made breakthough on Athletic and Canoe.

On ther other hand, the US basketball dreamteam was suppposed to won the game. But their arrogant turned the gold into bronze.

"Life is like a box of chocolate, you never know what you will get", said Gump's Mom.

As far as myself concerned, I've been using Gmail for months, but got not invitations to others. Today, when I open my mail inbox, discovered there were 6 invitaions, and I got another 6 later on. what a box of chocolate! hehehe.

Coincident

2004-08-14T15:24:00.000+08:00

Once a friend of mine told me his dicovery "Once you encounter something like words, concepts, names and etc. you would often encouter them again in a very short period." he thought it was very weird.

My explanation to him was "it is a kinda 'selective acceptance' of information". And both he and i was satisfied with this explanation.

Yesterday, when I was on a bus to my friend's home at 1pm, I saw two cars special. The first was a white enlengthened Linclon, the second was a Camro. Then, at 7pm, I was on a bus back home. I saw the both cars I encoutered in the afternoon.

What surprised most was not the two cars. I picked up a CD of Björk at an AV store. And when I was listening the her music, Björk appeared in the TV screen -- she sang for the Athens 2004 Opening.

So much coincidents in one day, I cannot explain it. It's weird!

Scary Game

2004-08-12T15:18:00.000+08:00

These days, i have been immersing myself in the game "DOOM3 Reloaded". The game is nodoubt another triller by ID soft, costs them 4 years to complete it. With the most advaced graphic engine, the game takes the player to another world -- Mars on 2145.

Althougth playing at the lowest screen resolution and image quality, with all special effects turned off, and of course the easy game settings, I still found the game scary. Those creatures, monsters, infected staffs just show up beside you and attack you. However the most scary scenario for me is when i walk into a room, i saw nothing, but heard screamming from behind the wall, beneath the floor, I realized that they are everywhere but I just could see none.

I remember words from my philosophy teacher "what one fears most is not death but unknown things to him." But everyone seems to fear about death, then i speculate what we really fear could be the "when" and "how" of the death. Futher, just like Rumsfeld said, there are "known knows", "known unknows", "unkown knows" and "unknown unknows", I guess I should have refer to some Artifical Intelligence books on the "Epistemic Logic" topic to map those into real world.

hehehe, I'm getting too far away. Okey, Back to Doom. Then, I got some cheat codes. I input them in the console to turn the "God Mode" on. Then, I had no concern about the "how" and "when" of my death. All fears had gone, then I just striked upon them with great vengeance and fury, then they would know i was in "God" mod.

the making of "the angry youth"

2004-08-07T13:30:00.000+08:00

Warning: This blog is restricted for language.

Ladies and Gentlemen, I'm glad to be here tonight. I'd like to make some announcements here tonight.

First of all, f*ck Pele! Pele, you should have shut the f*ck up before any match. Just like what you did in the 2002 world cup.

Secondly, f*ck Nakata! shame on you!, that's obviously a handball.

Thirdly, f*ck the referee, didn't you notice that? how could you using two standards toward the two teams in one match. you gave japs too many freekicks while you didn't give a shit at jap's foul.

F*ck LiYi, what a chance did you hava? you should have goaled. that's an one on one.

F*ck the jap assholes pretended to be injured to waste time after jap got the lead.

F*ck the people in the stadium, you should stop the bus, burn it and beat the all jap players.

F*ck all the japs, i'll hate you all from now on. i swear not to buy anything made in japan.

F*ck!

hehehe, then, am i qualified to be a cynic "angry youth" now? i guess i am.

偶像崇拜

2004-08-03T13:27:00.000+08:00

高中班级聚会总是让人期待的，在聚会上总会见到老同学、老朋友、老情人、老情敌，等等，当然，还有老师。今天的雨并没有影响班机聚会的正常进行，据我的老师说，她刚刚探望了在哈尔滨的一位老朋友，然后便来到聚会的地点。我的老同学们，也在下班后，陆续赶来。

我所说的老师，她比我们大整整12岁，是指我的高中最后一年接替班任的语文老师，在她接手班级不久，便成为了班级中不少人的偶像。

她给我的第一次深刻的印象，并不是其他人心中的“每天都会有不同的服饰”，而是她所教给我们的一堂课。那是普通的一堂语文课，对我来说，是一门极其枯燥的课，突然，窗外骤雨降临。那是98年的骤雨，松花江的水面已经超过警戒水位，防洪是那个时候新闻的主题。这场雨让班级的所有人唏嘘不已，而且似乎都有种旁观的感觉。也许心里都在想“这下可有热闹看了”，也有人将这个想法低声说出口。我记得当时许久老师没有说话，然后便批评了这种看热闹的想法，具体内容我已经记不得，但是那种羞愧的感觉至今还让我无地自容。不久，老师带着几个同学去看望了抗洪官兵。这堂课，我从老师那里学到，人应该有那么一点点正义感。

关于我的老师的过去，先写这么多，我也恐怕写多了，本篇就会彻彻底底的成为回忆我的老师的命题作文。

在许多人的心中，老师是一位活得非常“滋润”的人，这种“滋润”当然是表现在多方面的。这几年的聚会，每一次见到老师，都会有人说老师变得更加年轻漂亮了。这当然是“滋润”的最直接的外在体现。然而，在背后，老师似乎有更加滋润的生活。她有一位好丈夫，一个聪明懂事的儿子，一份不错的工作，和一个很不错的人际关系……这一切都是为班里的同学津津乐道的。无疑，老师成为了班里面女同学的榜样和楷模，我的另一位老师也常跟我提起她很佩服，而甚至在高中毕业前，男生中便流传着“娶妻应像韩杰梅”的口号。

聚会中，老师对我们说，“我感觉你们现在很好，很多东西都是未知的”。而我们对偶像的崇拜，归根结底，都是因为她的那些已知。这些说到底，都是钱先生的的“围城”的那个命题。我有时候在想，是谁修建的围城？如果去掉壁垒，那又是什么效果，却没有得出一个结论。不过，就事论事，拥有未知还是好的，因为我的现有的已知都不能让自己满意，期待我余下的未知的求值结果。

香车美女

2004-07-29T11:10:00.000+08:00

哈尔滨近两年的车展，我都会过去凑凑热闹。每次从车展归来都会有种怅然神伤的感觉，人问其所以然，答曰“香车美女，均与我绝缘，颇受刺激，因此神伤”。得到的回应，一种是“面包会有的”式的劝慰，一种是“发什么神经?”式的反问，再者就是触动了对方这根同样敏感的神经，将这种神伤传染给对方。

“香车”和“美女”都是奢侈生活的标志，两词联合使用想必威力更大。某种意义上来讲“香车美女”已经成为了奢侈生活的借代修辞，也更确切的成为了各地车展的主题。香车+美女已经足够可以吸引大批人的眼球，特别是与香车美女绝缘的人们的眼球，譬如本人的眼球。香车美女如此多娇，引无数英雄竞掏腰包。

车展中，衡量一辆车是否“香”的主要依据有二：第一就是里在车边上的标价牌上，从末尾0的个数（或者9,8,6的个数）中可以些许看出一二；第二，就是香车车旁边的美女到底有多美。无需倾国倾城，只需“倾展”便可以说明车有多“香”了。

然而，就是在车展这种“与香车美女的临时亲密接触”的活动中，你也是不能完成你许多心愿的。香车外的一层护栏，已经清楚了告诫你游戏的规则“远观而不可亵玩”。不过规则也有例外的时候，就是在你能像有一张VIP的胸卡的时候，也许可以坐到车里意淫一下该车的驾乘乐趣。美女也是如此，传闻中最大牌的模特，当然也是车展中最昂贵的劳斯莱斯的模特，只在车展中出场了两天。而那两天是被定为“专业人士的参观时间”，对于专业的评定，取决于车展的票价。我等享受30元门票的观众，则无缘看到这位“倾展”名模。

有人提出，香车美女走得如此亲近，这意味着汽车是一种“雄性动物”。看起来这是一个不错的观点。无论是棱角的外观或者肌肉般的曲线，都体现着汽车的雄性性状。不过，男人对车的喜爱，是否有意味着这有一些gay呢？答曰“非也”，得到的解释是汽车曾在性解放运动中所起到的关键作用，等等。醍醐灌顶。前一阵，在CNN上看到一条消息:根据调查BMW的拥有者的性事更多，其次是奥迪，大众……最差的是保时捷。

以后如果买车，就买BMW的国产货了！

Le Peuple Migrateur

2004-07-25T11:02:00.000+08:00

"Le Peuple Migrateur" is a splendid documentary movie. The movie is astonishingly beautify and sets peple thinking. It's a movie about life, it shows us how beautify and how persistent the life is.

The English title of this movie is "Winged Migration" or "Travelling Birds", however, the actual meaning of the Frech words in the title should be "People Migrated" or maybe "Travelling People".

I don't know wheather there is any metaphor behind that, but in my mind, I think in fact people do migrate a lot. At least, I've seen it a alot.

My uncle has migrated to Canada since the year 2002. Then, My aunt and my cousin moved to him the next year. My uncle was a manager of a company, he also worked in a language school here as a chief. but he could get a job in Canada as he'd got in China. His first jobs there was very phsyical ones, and he got exausted everyday. He is now working in a supermarket, in charge of some staffs, but I'm sure he is not happy about the work. Also, my aunt was an accountant here, but she is now working in a bread factory. and she is worrying about her sick father in Harbin everyday. I think they didn't get better life there, all they did is for their son. He'll grow up in a healthier envoriment, recieve a better education and probabley will lead a brighter future.

A friend of mine has just left Harbin for Chongqing in Sunday. He was looking for some internships there. And after the intern, he would have slim change to remain in Harbin. He has a girlfriend in Harbin, who has already got a stable job teaching English in campus and probably wouldn't move into anther place during these years. Some sugeested him live in Harbin with his girl, however, he wanted a try away from home. I've no idea what they have planned or what the girl's concern. but I think it is always a sad thing for couples drifting apart. Anyhow, there're more oppcunities in other cities than in Harbin.

C'est la vie. When you get something, you will get something to lose at the same time. A very cynic version is "everyone is destnated by his/her inital value -- wise and wealth given by parents".

I also listed some pros and cons of hunting a job in larger citys with my friends. Still, the cons cannot stop me from going out, as it didn't stop the other people. because we'll never figure out how much it gains and how much it pains till we get it.